When do you share your love for makeup with a new friend or partner?

For me, it usually comes up pretty quickly – maybe within three meetings since it is related to the “what do you do” question!

— Christine


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Katherine T. Avatar

It depends. If I notice somebody is wearing no makeup or very minimal amounts, I usually don’t bring it up , or only very casually say ” oh, I was looking online for some sales on makeup”, then see what their reactions are. If they just shrug, I avoid the topic. If they say “oh, what sales? what were you looking for?” then I can talk about it. If I see someone wearing more makeup, then I bring it up more quickly. Or if someone asks me for recommendations, than game on! Out of my circle of friends/family, I’m the only one that wears any makeup, everyone else wears nothing or very, very minimal amounts. And nobody seems to understand my obsession, so I don’t like to bring it up. As for hubby, my obsession started well after I met and married him, so he’s stuck with it, comes with the territory LOL

Katherine T. Avatar

For a new guy, I suggest not bringing it up until he gets to know you better. Most guys have no idea about makeup, won’t understand our obsession (I don’t even understand it myself!), and might freak out if they see the size of our collections ( I freak out, too). But if he’s serious about you, and you have other common interests, then it’s easier to understand or accept. For my hubby, he doesn’t get it, but he accepts it. I spend my own money on it, and I’m financially responsible, so that’s huge. And it keeps me happy, pretty, and sane, so he’s good. And it helps to show some interest in his hobbies

Nancy T Avatar

Since I almost never leave home without it, it’s written all over my face!
Friends and even acquaintances figure it out fairly quickly, as for future, possible dating scenarios, I would make it very clear upfront. My stand is basically: Don’t like my kids/ grandkids? Bye! Don’t like cats or other fuzzies? Bye! Don’t like me being into or wearing makeup? Bye!

Rachel R. Avatar

I met my husband when I was 16, and even back then, I wore full makeup. It was the ’80s, after all. Even back then, I changed things up, so he knew I loved makeup.

I don’t have a set amount of time for telling friends. It kind of happens organically. I almost always have on a full face, and vary my colors a lot, so most people figure it out.

Momo Avatar

When it’s with a new friend, I tend to share my love of makeup after a few compliments. Normally, they eventually ask what I’m wearing [on any given part of my face], and that’s usually my cue to divulge.

If it’s sharing with a partner, well…he’ll immediately know once he walks into my bedroom. My makeup collection, sort of, stands out. He couldn’t miss it if he tried. My bestie thinks of it as a little boutique in the corner of my room. LOL

Regina Avatar

Probably only if we discuss about makeup related things. Wish I could be more open about sharing my love for makeup but its tough when people judge you based on the brands you use.

Alicia Johnson Morris Avatar

People who judge you based on the brands you use are clueless! Makeup love isn’t about the sticker on the front (or back) of the package!

Wednesday Avatar

I usually do not talk about makeup to anyone unless they express interest first. It doesn’t generally come up in conversation, but occasionally it will when another woman (usually a complete stranger) will comment on my skin and it goes from there. Very few people actually have even the slightest inkling of my interest in cosmetics and would probably be quite shocked and surprised at the extent of my stash. I tend to get my makeup related fixes and discussions on-line only.

Ray Avatar

I’d say it comes up pretty organically, since it’s something that women who love makeup tend to spot in each other. Outside of the online beauty community, it’s fairly uncommon to see women wearing blended eye looks or using products in a way that tells me that she keeps up with new releases. I try to keep it minimal though – if someone compliments my lipstick I’ll talk about lipstick, but I’ve caused wayyyyyy too many people’s eyes to glaze over with a detailed rundown of various primers.

Pearl Avatar

As for new friend, I’m not sure it would come up, really – it’d probably be obvious by me saying “Hey! Let’s go get a makeover!” or “Sephora’s having their sale!” at some point. I have a close circle of friends but I’m the only makeup enthusiast, save for one but what I spend on makeup, she spends on a little makeup and mostly other hobbies. She’s the only one I drag with me for makeovers or to Sephora. Otherwise, I don’t know that I would really talk about it with a new friend or new partner because it’s “my thing” and wouldn’t really expect them to care or be into it like I am. Come to think of it, I don’t think I would want another friend that is into it like I am. I like it being my thing and don’t want anyone else to encroach on it, you know?

Maggie Avatar

Same if it’s the sort of meetings where you converse a lot one-on-one. I mean, usually I compliment the other person on their look and the sharing starts there. But I don’t wear any when I go to yoga for example so none of my yoga friends really know

Fran Avatar

I don’t think of mentioning it specifically — I guess I figure it’s right there an my face for everyone to see, especially since most women in my age group and geographic area wear an extremely conservative amount of makeup (as in, little to none). Although, a couple of times I’ve been surprised because I’ve mentioned something about wearing makeup to someone I’ve known for a long time, and they were surprised to learn that I wear any base products! (when in fact I wear primers, concealers, CC Cream, powder, bronzer/countour, blush, highlight… ) So I guess my application skills are better than I usually give myself credit for. If I met someone in my age group who was obviously as into makeup as I am, it might be fun to bring it up, though. I’ll have to think about that.

Erin Avatar

It doesn’t come often when making new friends, very few people ever ask me what I do. They usually ask why I don’t have kids. Being in the military, being this old without kids is uncommon and weird. That’s usually when they walk away!

Other people will find out partly though asking or my wearing makeup to events and them asking about who did it.

Kitty Avatar

That’s too bad that people ask why you don’t have kids. It seems this is only asked of women, not men. I find it rude and intrusive. It bothers me that 97% of time, it’s women who ask this, and I feel like I’m being judged. Where’s all this feminism I keep reading about?

For the last 10-15 years, I’ve been relieved to finally outgrow that question, only to now be asked if I have grandchildren. At least they don’t ask why I don’t have grandchildren, but I still feel like the questioning signals a limited view of what’s fulfilling in life for the modern woman.

Solanace Avatar

Totally! Earth is suffocating under 7 billion people and this mentality has to change. I won’t even say there are many ways to be fulfilled, because the entire discourse seems idiotic to me. Just let me drink a cold beer eating peanuts and reading a romance or makeup and perfume blogs, thank you.

Wednesday Avatar

I also have no children. I’m 52 and have never experienced that moment which women talk about.. that deep seated desire and longing. I was happy with my career and travelling the world and honestly I would have been a lousy mom because I was miserable when I had to be in any one place for any length of time . I found out in my forties I most likely couldn’t have had kids even if I had wanted. I have endured a whole pile of judgement over the years and most recently with a new Ob/Gyn who is obviously no longer my doctor.

I’ve never felt incomplete without them. I have always been shocked at the negative attitudes from other women (and men too!!) but fortunately have truly amazing female friends who both have and do not have kids of their own and could give a rats ass whether I do or don’t.

Besides that: over the next two months I have approximately 175 dairy goats who are going to be ‘kidding out’.. more than plenty of kids to deal with. They just happen to be of the hairy super obnoxious cute four legged variety. Animals have always been a better and natural fit for me.

Charley JB Avatar

I think my partner-to-be very quickly discovered my passion for makeup, when on our first date, I called & told her I would be “leaving shortly, I just have to do my makeup.”
I ended up arriving at her apartment 3 hours later… The trip itself only took a half hour!
In my defense, my makeup was completely on point & she obviously approved since we’ve now been together almost a year & live together.
She’s even let me take over the 2nd bedroom to let me have a “makeup room!”
Now THATS love!!!!

Ciara Avatar

I’ve always loved makeup, but I haven’t been as avid of a collector until recently. My fiancé understands my addiction and likens it to his own with gaming. If I were only just dating, my date probably would see I wear minimal makeup on the day to day, and maybe wouldn’t realize how much I am into it until the boyfriend/significant other stage. My close friends love that I’m such a connoisseur as they come to me for advice and product recommendations as well as shopping trips and IMATS outings.

Claire L Avatar

I don’t usually talk much about my love for beauty products because I often feel judged for spending money on it. People don’t understand how it makes me happy, is fun to experiment with, and talk about with other beauty fans online. People like my mum think it’s frivolous and a waste of money if you buy more than you need, so I keep it to myself. My fiancé sort of understands, he loves it when I put makeup when I go out. He knows I enjoy it and take pleasure in applying it so I look my best. He has an obsession with sneakers and trainers and often window shops online for them, occasionally buying them! So we share that lol.

Cmcbride1@aol.com Avatar

I usually see if they wear makeup routinely or even if they mention a product they like I will mention that I either like that product or if I know of a dupe, on that line of things.

Nicole Avatar

Christine, Thank you for posting my question! I appreciate all the advice! I have always loved makeup and beauty. I guess I wondered about this because my stash has grown a lot in the past few years and I have been single (other than a few light dates). I am hoping to one day not be single. But, as Nancy T. put it, I absolutely would rather be single than give up myself, or even more my daughter. The guy is just going to have to like me for me and I like makeup. I mean, I have dealt with a many of sports programs. Sports are not my thing. So, no reason this should not be a two way street. I feel like I have seen so many of my girlfriends give up themselves and their husbands gave up nothing. But, I totally won’t freak them out right away! Thanks everyone! 🙂

Paz Avatar

Never! Yesterday, a friend talked to me about wanting to get rid of her dark circles surgically, and that was the only time I brought up makeup during our conversation, because I won’t let her go under the knife when she can buy a color correcting palette instead.
I also don’t show my stash to anyone. I’d rather tell them I have a ziplock bag full of human hair in the closet than admitting to owning more than 30 eyeshadow palettes, because that’s insane.

Marie-Estelle Avatar

It is not a subject I talk about outside of the beauty community because the use of make up is often misunderstood. To me, make up introduces colors in my life, variety in my look…. I am not trying to hide who I am or to become someone else!

My partner knew me before I got really hooked with make up (understand 1 khol, 1 mascara and a dior palette as my whole collection) but he often compliments my looks and enjoy when I put some extra efforts to seduce him. He is also the first to tell me to jump on a LE if I really want it (let’s see how long he will say that haha) or to watch me do my make up with a little smile.

Jenn Avatar

It comes up sometimes with new friends, I’m pretty open about it if they ask what kind of things I’m into. And my boyfriend is amazing, he lets me ramble on about anything and everything makeup related, but I let him do the same with video games. I think if you’re really in love you just accept everything about them, and at least make an attempt to be interested in what they love, or at least tolerate it.

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