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Happy Mothers' Day!
Happy Mothers’ Day!
The Temptalia family is wishing all of our mothers–fur-moms, aunts, uncles, grandmothers, sisters, friends, mentors, and all those amazing people in our lives that nurture and foster our dreams, hopes, and passions–the most wonderful day of the year! Â We love and appreciate you everyday of the year (okay, maybe not every day, sometimes you drive us batty!), but especially today with extra hugs and kisses.
3 Things My Mom Taught Me About Beauty
- Beauty comes from the inside. I actually wasn’t allowed to wear makeup growing up, so I didn’t get into makeup until I went away to college (so just when I turned 18). Â While I didn’t get to learn about how to apply makeup from my mom, she taught me that beauty is about more than what you put on your face, and I think it’s a really great lesson to have taught to you over and over again growing up.
- Cross your fingers for good genes. My mother doesn’t wear makeup, and she doesn’t have any crazy skincare routine. Â In fact, I’m not really sure what she did for skincare prior to me being a beauty blogger. Â She only wears sunscreen when she goes to the beach and yet has very few signs of aging at 50+. Â She just reminds me that for all the lotions and potions I buy, genetics may be the one thing I have to hang my hat on and just hope for.
- “Flaws” are signs of character. It took me almost twenty years to come to terms with my beauty mark (the larger one, by my nose). Â For years, I waffled over whether to remove it or not. Â I didn’t feel insecure about it until my early teens, because my parents never made me feel that way growing up. Â They always referred to it as a beauty mark, which I think has a very different connotation than the word “mole.” Â She would tell me it made me unique and more beautiful.
3 Reasons Why I Appreciate My Mom
- She is my mentor. My Mom has held C-level executive positions throughout her career. Â She has a bachelor’s degree, three masters’ degrees, and is currently working on her PhD. Â There is no one who motivates and encourages me more to continually better myself than her, because she truly does lead by example.
- Who I am today is because of her. (And my Dad!) Â I owe so much to both my parents for instilling good values and beliefs that have helped guide me to make the right decisions to get me to where I am today. Â I’m often asked how I’m able to balance everything, and I think it’s because of an internalized desire to prioritize, plan, and schedule. Â When I was little, I had a big easel with a daily schedule written out–when to play, do homework, eat dinner, have a bath, and so on.
- She is my #1 supporter. There is nothing that I can’t do, according to my Mom. Â She thinks I’m capable of anything I want to do and that kind of unwavering confidence and support has been key. Â I’m not afraid to dream big or pursue lofty goals, because I know I have her support and she will always be there for me if I make a mistake.
Feel free to share any lessons you’ve learned and the like in the comments! 🙂
My mom actually was so touched my words/post this morning that she wanted to reply with some of her own:
What mother would not have cried reading her daughter’s note like the above? Christine, you made me cried buckets of happy tears reading it (and I am not the crying kind). I also feel compelled to join this conversation. I hope it is all okay with all of you, Christine’s readers, who are one of her sources of strength and inspiration.
First, to all the furry and non-furry sons and daughters, it is you that make us ‘mothers’ so a big heartfelt thank you!
The learning goes both ways, so I want to share the three things I learn from Christine:
- Love is given freely but respect is earned: it is often assumed that our kids must love and respect parents or vice versa. I love her unconditionally, but until I saw how she is building her life and the incredible amount of work, effort and dedication she puts in Temptalia, I also developed a deep respect for her. I can’t do what she does, and I really don’t know how she does it all! I learned that I need to earn her respect, too, as a parent and a human being. The love and the respect expressed in Christine’s note meant more than anything else. She is both a daughter and a friend whom I want to hang out with.
- Power of “Letting go”: this must be one of the hardest lesson that I learned. Let go of my ‘baby’ and let her take risks and create a new independent life, away from “mommy,” was so difficult. I hurt when I read nasty comments about her and had to resist answering those unkind and false accusations. When she tells me about some challenges that she needs to deal with, I want desperately to rush in and tell her to let me “take care of it.”  I learned to rise above these emotions and resist these temptations; and I would give her advice but leave her to make her own decisions. I learned that in letting go both she and I have become stronger people and our relationship seems to get stronger too. I must admit that this is very difficult thing to do since I still find it difficult as I am going through this with my younger daughter right now.
- Hope for the future of our world: when I was a child and my parents would push me to do this or that, , I would give them a hard time and resist their efforts! They would always tell me that it is because they want me “‘to be smarter and do better than them.”   I did not quite understand that lesson until I saw how Christine and my younger daughter are doing today – they both have achieved so much more than what I did at their age. Can you imagine how the future of the world will be when the current generation is so much more creative and smarter than the previous generation? And that gives me hope that the future of the world is in good hands.
A big virtual hug to all the sons and daughters out there!
Wow! Your mother sounds like an amazing woman! I always wondered where your workaholic ethic came from. Now I know.
Haha! I’m very much like my mom (personality, characteristics, etc.); my sister is much more like my Dad!
Your mom has three master’s degrees? That is so awesome!
My mom taught me that it is possible to soldier on and do what is necessary in life in order to achieve your goals. I don’t think I would have turned out to be a MUA/aspiring anthropologist if I had not seen her work ethic.
Yep, at one point, I sure planned to outdo her on degrees, but when she went for her PhD, she really killed that dream (her third masters was awarded through her PhD program).
Sounds like your Mom is amazing! 🙂 Having a good work ethic is so important and it’s amazing how much is learned through our parents.
Yup, she would work 14-16 hours a day when I was a kid to give us a comfortable life, and still take us to the movies on the weekends.
Wow!! Supermom right there 🙂
Lovely post; your dog is so precious!
I really don’t have a great mom. I moved out of her house when I was 13 to live with my dad because she was married to an abusive alcoholic. I told her either she could leave him, or I would leave her.
My dad, on the other hand, taught me everything. He did a great job taking the place of a mother. He brought me to makeup counters, flipped through magazines with me, gave me my sense of style, and reminded me to feel beautiful in my own skin. I always give my dad something for Mother’s Day and Father’s Day, since he was great at playing both roles.
“Mothers” come in so many forms and should never just be limited to a biological mom. I love that you celebrate your Dad on Mother’s Day AND Father’s Day!
Hats off to your dad! Sounds like a great person 🙂
agree with christine, and kudos to your dad!
OMG you totally made me cry! Your dad sounds like an Angel, please give him a huge hug, he so deserves it!
My mom and I grew up in quite different societies so naturally we’re very different people. I’m a lot more like my dad in many ways, but I’m still my mother’s daughter. My mom’s always said that I got the best of both of them and will exceed them both (I don’t agree…I just had more opportunities!). We don’t always get along, but at the end of the day no matter what, I’ll always know how much my mom loves me. And though we might argue, I truly admire her for her strength of character (that I sort of…am still developing haha). She was widowed in her 40s and still manages to bring my brother and I up alone. She always puts us first and herself second. She says it’s part of being a mother, but I know that’s just her going above and beyond it all. She can tend to be deeply critical and lose faith in me sometimes, but deep down I know she just wants what’s best for me and will do whatever it takes to help get me there. Sometimes she just doesn’t know what needs to be done in order to support me is all.
Totally going to read this to her now x3 Thanks Christine, this was a good exercise 🙂
Sounds like my mom & sister – they argue a lot, but I know all my mom wants is the very best for her! I bet she’ll appreciate that you know where she’s coming from 🙂
3 Master’s degree and working her PhD!? That’s really awesome of your Mom!
You know, your mom’s teaching is similar to my mom’s. Maybe, it’s an Asian thing. My mom also taught me the importance of work ethics and good education. She was so ecstatic to learn that I’ve got admitted to a PhD program with full-funding last year. It was a little tough at some point, but I’m happy that I survived my first year.
I, too, wasn’t allow to wear make until way into college. I think, by not emphasizing wearing makeup early in life, it has made me focus on the other kind of beauty – the inner beauty.
Since my mom is also a nurse, she put a lot of emphasis on nutrition. A healthy diet produces a healthy body (and skin). I eat a lot of vegetables, esp. tomatoes and I always have a naturally glowing cheeks (they not rosacea) that I can often skip wearing blushes. I am tall and skinny all due to my mom. She encouraged me to drink lots of milk (plain, not flavored) and avoid extreme sugary-sweet food (be it candies, sodas, etc) and greasy food.
I owe a lot to my mom. I have always been thankful to her (365 days a year, not just Mother’s day) and I have never given her any worries/heartaches such as drugs, boys, driving recklessly, etc. Even now as I’m going to be out in the working world a few years later while my mom is getting older and planning to retire, I will be there for her both financially and emotionally.
P.S. I also have a mole on my face in which I had wanted to get rid of. It’s at the corner of my left eye. My mom always tell me that it is something unique of me. Oddly, I come to appreciate it nowadays 😛
Congrats on your fully funded PhD admittance!! That is incredible!
And you are really, really lucky to have a mom who instilled nutrition into you at an early age, because I bet it makes it easier to resist and fall prey to some of the really unhealthy foods we have available now.
sounds like a really great mom! I’m feeling a little jealous, I lost my mom 7 months ago, and she was very stricted with me, but I still love her the same, and man! I miss her a lot!
I’m so sorry for your loss, Martha!
Beautiful post. Your mom is sure to love it. 🙂
Thank you!
My mom, now long passed, had a makeup drawer with tons of space in it – maybe 2 shades of eyeshadow, two polish shades and a few other things. I played in it all. She would be aghast at my stash of makeup and skin care products I have as well as some of the price points I have gone to as well for some. Mom only did a few make overs, from Jafra and Vivian Woodward skin care reps when she got tied into it. It made no impact on her and she was not sucked into much other than maybe a correction on her foundation which she did teach me as a teen to always make sure I had the correct color I was using so I never went out with something that looked really unnatural. I wore more makeup in high school and spent more time on it than did my mom. But she did stress washing my face 2 times a day. She was overly concerned with taking me to the doctor for even the least amount of what I call normal skin teen break outs. Sadly as as teen they only gave us ongoing tetracycline, not knowing it was sun sensitive or that it would turn your teeth yellow over time. She made sure I went to a derm in college who wanted to do light booth treatments as well as antibiotics. I still had the big one on the nose and an occasional headlight hidden under my bangs as a teen. My mom also was beautiful inside and out. I wish she had lived longer. She was just starting to bloom out of some difficult times and chronic low self esteem when cancer hit. I was astounded at her memorial when we had more than 300 folks show up, unable to accommodate them into the place I had it. I wondered so much how they all heard and marveled at how far many travels to come for her service. I was the main speaker and was so glad the AM of that day, the words just came to me in written form – perhaps the best public speech I ever have given. It spoke to each select area of friends and family that I had no idea all would be represented there that day. Mom loved pinks. She hated fall flower colors- I love fall colors.
Your mom must have had such a huge impact on the people around her – that is so amazing! Thank you for sharing, Meme!
That is such a touching post! 😀 Your Mom sounds awesome, Christine.
She is! Thank you! 🙂
My parents have always taught me to not lose family values, culture, and identity because it is what also keeps us together, amongst other traits. Beauty DOES come from within, and that has taught me purity, and purity has taught me how to better take care of myself. I have gotten a lot of “You look stressed” from friends and family and that is enough to let me know that not only am I a hard worker, I also forgot to take care of myself as well!
HAPPY MOTHERS DAY EVERYONE and this day is really a refresher day for me to realize how much we do appreciate those in our lives and that alone drives us to hope and not give up where we want to be and who we want to be.
Christine, you are a wonderful person, and so are your parents for being a good example for you; even perfect or imperfect moments in life!
I hear ya – definitely have had people say, “You look tired!” or “Busy week?” LOL!
Wow, you have a lot to live up to Christine. lol. Even more so when/if you become a mom. Pressure! lol.
LOL!
Your post made me tear up too! It’s wonderful to have such an inspiring mom who leads by example. And it made me more motivated to use schedules and routines with my kids – it’s easy to play it by ear, but learning to structure your day is an invaluable lesson.
What I’ve learned from my mom is to always have the best intentions and NEVER waste any time on people who wrong you. We truly believe that when you are good, good things come to you. My mother is also very intuitive and spiritual, and I believe she’s passed that down to me, as my “gut feelings” and instincts get stronger the older I get – it’s an amazing gift:-)
What a great lesson 🙂 My mom also shares the same value – she says to always be generous and good to people and you’ll get it back.
Mother’s Day has come and gone for me (in the UK) but my mother is all about compassion and warmth. Everyone wants her to be their mother, and I’m lucky she’s mine. She never went to college (she got married instead) but I don’t believe that degrees measure a person’s worth for one milisecond. Kindness is what matters, and my mother has that. We have “adopted children” because she took them in when they had difficult family situations, and I consider them part of my extended family now. They still come to us (even though most are in their 20s now) for refuge and a cuddle. She has sacrificed a lot, particularly for me as I have a disability. I tell my mother I love her as often as I can. I try to emulate her warmth and kindness, because the world is a hard place and there’s no need to make it worse.
I forgot to mention, my father died when I was young, so she basically raised 3 kids by herself, including a baby who was 4 weeks old when my father died. There is a stepfather but he was basically useless. My mother footed ALL the bills, worked, and did all the housework.
Your mother sounds inspiring, Anita! Kindness is absolutely invaluable – your story reminds me of my boyfriend’s mom, who I love dearly – kindness, caring, sincerity to all.
My mom is my best friend in the entire world. We often call each other our soul mates. No one can make me as mad as she does or make me feel as good. No one will ever love me unconditionally the way my mother does. It is almost enough to make me want kids of my own. Almost.
Awwww!!
My momma taught me you can go beyond the medical field’s expectations. I wasn’t actually diagnosed with Autism until I was 3, but my parents were told when I was about eight months old I wouldn’t be able to walk, talk, draw, comprehend and do anything like a normal human could because I wasn’t developing on time (I wasn’t even babbling) and my Epilepsy was pretty severe at that point; they told my parents to institutionalize me. I would, for lack of a better metaphor, be nothing but a doll in a wheelchair. My mom thought I had more spunk and that I could do more so she put me in just about every form of therapy. Even when I was properly diagnosed with what I had (Autism and CP. I do still have Epilepsy), the doctor’s couldn’t believe there was much hope for me. My mom has always defied them. Obviously, I’m not the person they expected. I’m walking, talking, etc. I actually only have mild cases.
Back in the early 90s, doctor’s didn’t know what to do for Autism due to little research so we were called “Never Children” because we were told we’d “never” be able to do anything. Today, it’s different, but back then it was different. Many parents had no idea what to do so we were left with few opportunities for therapy. I was an exception and I’m very lucky for my mom. I’m lucky I have a mom that still fights with the government for me. She’s a fighter!
Your story is so inspiring! 🙂 Your mom is definitely a fighter, too, for not giving into the doctors and helping you prove all of them wrong.
She’s a big fighter. She used to drag me to therapy–with me biting, kicking, screaming and clawing (apparently it IS possible to do it all at once). She almost gave up on me a million times, but the kicking/screaming/clawing/biting/full body tantrums to her meant I had more than what the doctors said I had.
Speaking was the hardest part for me. I learned ASL while I was in speech therapy to learn the basics (i.e. “I want,” “I need,” or “Katie wants..”). I was forbidden ASL at age five by my mom and the therapists to get me to use words. I knew simple sentences, but at age 5 they made me use “I want,” “I need,” instead of just my just saying, “Cheerio” for “Cheerios.” My mom had many a headache with the speech thing, especially since she majored in linguistics!
This is wonderful – thank you for sharing! I particularly like the bit about the “flaws.” Mothers are amazing.
They are 🙂
Happy mama day to you Christine!! Mellan is your baby!! TOTALLY off topic, just curious what font you use for the headline of this post “Happy Mother’s Day” That would be perfect for my thesis presentation… thankies!
I believe it’s this one – http://www.dafont.com/walkway.font
hats off to your mom and wonderful daughter like you 😀 you made me sit and think what I had done for my mom and I think there is still long way to go … they had loads of financial problems but never made me deprive of anything 😀
i totally agree with your mum, when your children grows up it is so hard to but out of their lives, you feel like you have lost control and after years of bringing them up and doing your best its hard to just stop and leave them to make their own decisions and mistakes. its been actually heartbreaking for me as you feel a little bit rejected and it hurts.
are you guys adorable or what? it reminds me of the relationship i have with my mom and aren’t we the luckiest daughters to have such incredible mothers? i certainly am. this was a wonderful entry that made me smile & sniffle at the same time. 🙂
We definitely are 🙂
Christine and mom, I got all teary eyed reading your posts. I hope I will have similar relationships with my kids.
Until I reached the age of 35, I’d drive my mom’s nuts for not caring about my look. A couple of lipsticks and sunscreen were all I had with me until several years ago I found temptalia (and other beauty blogger sites), then my collection started to expand in numbers and into various products. She’s the only mom I know thought who would not give a peep of how many products I put on my face/my eyes or how bright! In fact, she thought nude lipsticks were lame. A couple of days ago when we were watching TV she suddenly got up, and was back with a shadow palette and a brush and started to show me how to best created creases on my eyes just because I told her I liked a certain anchor’s eye makeup. Now who’s mother would still do that! I know then that I would still be able to talk makeup and other little things mothers and daughters share when she’s 90 🙂
Haha! That is so great! Is she a full-on beauty junkie?
This is lovely Christine. I lost my mother when I had just turned 19 and it would actually have been her birthday today (but we have mothers day in March in the UK)so it’s lovely to see that you really appreciate her – it makes me upset when people don’t appreciate their mothers.
Christine, you are great! Congratulations from Brazil for you and your family!
greats posts, mom n daughter! happy mom’s day!
You and your mummy are so lovely. You’re both very lucky. Wish the best for you and your family! Thoughts from France. xx
i love your beauty mark. always listen to mama <3
that was very sweet! Hope you both had a great mother’s day (you for your doggie :)) I love the collage of him as he aged! So cute!
Beautiful! I love reading about strong relationships about a parents and children. 🙂
Awwwww. What a great post 🙂 Happy Ma day to all you Mas ‘over the pond’. Mothers day is in March in the UK and this year was my first one being a mum. Went out with my family for lunch, which included my Ma and Grannie. There were four generations present, 3 of mothers, which was lovely.
Until having my son I have never fully appreciated how hard it must have been for my Ma to bring me up on her own – I even moan that it is hard not having her near by for support – lol!
Christine + Ma, you are both great!
Christine,
Thank you for sharing these wonderfully written sentiments from both you and your mom. They made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside!!
You have a wonderfull mom. Your words and espacially the words from your mom were so touching, it made me cry, cause our relationsship is so horrible… I would kill to her such wonderfull, moving words from my mother/father. Greetings from Germany
Wowwww this is such a nice post!
The most important lesson I learned from my mom was by something she NEVER did,which was hug or kiss me. Even though I have boys ,one 14 and the other almost 21,I shower them wiith affection.I never knew HOW important that lesson would be either as neither of my boys’ dads is very affectionate.