The Evolution of a Bath Pouf
Wednesday, June 8th, 2011
Shaun, aka The Tech Guy, aka my boyfriend, is here with another must-read “manly” review. He’s twenty-eight with normal-to-dry skin and suffers from no more acne (much to my envy!). He has no dedication whatsoever to his writing duties here on Temptalia, given his absence of nearly seven months. He says it keeps the public wanting more.
Shaun enjoys long walks on the beach, vegging out on the couch watching chick flicks, and cuddling with Mellan. Or maybe not! He handles all the behind-the-scenes action here at Temptalia, from tech support to server woes.
The Evolution of a Bath Pouf
All right, what is this thing called? You know… The spongey-majig? Bath… Pouf… Seriously, what is it really called? Bath pouf… So, I’ve been using something called a bath pouf for over ten years? I don’t know if I can go on.
(2 hours of reflecting and soul searching later…)
Yes, it’s true; I enjoy myself a good… Bath pouf… It is highly effective for exfoliation and administering shower gel to the various parts of my flesh! Wait until they hear about this at the next man meeting. Here’s the thing: there’s no good alternative to this to use in the shower!
You could use your hand, but I find that my hand doesn’t want to go certain places… And it tends to use up soap like it was hoarding it to sell on eBay. There’s the wash cloth, but I just find that thing limp and disgusting. I could use a loofa but my skin IS SENSITIVE. Plus, it’s a plant, and I barely want to eat plants let alone scrub my supple body with one.
Don’t even suggest to me the bar of soap! That thing collects hair like a broom at a hair salon (BOOM). Plus, it usually slips out of your hands and drops on your foot, then followed by: expletives, slipping in the shower, breaking your neck, and you taking a dirt nap! Do you want to single-handedly be responsible for the downfall of mankind?! Bar of soap… Pfft!
Let’s get on to the bath pouf! The bath pouf has three life-cycles. First is the cocoon phase. It is way too tight and doesn’t receive shower gel quite right. The lather-building is poor and the scrubbing is made difficult because of its lack of surface area! This is very scientific. However, once you’ve worked in the pouf it becomes a wondrous thing.
This cycle we like to call: ????? The magic of metamorphosis renders the bath pouf into a being of utmost perfection. It builds lather like a champ and covers your body perfectly with the right amount of exfoliation to scrub ratio. It is the perfect device for delivering your shower gel to your body!
The third phase is the saddest of all: the sunflower phase. Right when you’re getting into the tender years of your showering with your pouf, it grows old and tired and begins spreading out further and further until it has become an amorphous blob of sponge that can no longer be rendered as anything useful. The little rope around it breaks and becomes gross and slimy. It doesn’t hold its shape and becomes less useful in terms of exfoliating.
Here are some tips for you and your loved ones–feel free to read them to each other while sitting in front of a fire drinking a fine bourbon or cognac.
- Always wash the soap out of your pouf! If you don’t, the rope gets really slimy and feels so disgusting that you might as well just throw it out.
- If the rope breaks you can kind of re-tie it around the pouf and maybe get a few more showers out of it before it becomes unbearable to use. The rope is the lifeblood of the pouf, once it is becomes useless, the pouf loses all its majesty!
- To build a good lather, rinse it before use, then pour your soap on. Douse it a bit more with water and squeeze it a few times. This will give you a nice lather!
- Give it room to dry! You don’t want this thing to act like a petri dish. Plus it will wear out quicker if it’s constantly soaked.
- Buy many, and buy a few in manlier colors. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to cry myself through the shower while washing myself with a lavender pouf. Your guy will use it, but he’ll be more covert-ops about it if it is the color of lilac.
Tell me what you and/or your man use for body cleaning in the comments!
I was simply doing a Google search on how to clean these bath pouf things and came across this article. LOL - this was a GREAT read in the middle of my otherwise boring day! Thanks for the chuckle and I, too, am all too familiar with all the stages of 'la pouf' ... and the "????" stage - CLASSIC!!!!!!
What's another word for a bath pouf and I love this post my pouf is currently in the sunflower stage thanx for the help.
Ahahaha. I love that "I love myself a good..... bath pouf....." line!
I just read this, Christine. You are just too funny -- evolution of a bath pouf -- from 'pouf' to 'poof!' lol!
I was honestly wondering recently when you would return! yay! Sorry to say, I will never use a poof. All I think about is when my science teacher told us it was the most bacteria infested thing in our homes and to get rid of it if we had one. The hand does indeed use too much soap. I now use a wash cloth and toss it in the laundry after each use. Best for my germophobic mind.
I've missed your reviews!!! And this reminds me I need a new pouf
Excellent post! Very funny and VERY accurate. I can tell my current pouf is on the verge of entering sunflower stage. I think I can get another couple weeks out of it, though.
Haha, I love this! My bf started using a pouf after I forced one on him... er, introduced him to one. I brought over a white one and a blue one and he chose the white one because he didn't want to seem like he was making too big of a deal about it not being manly. He is now converted but will never admit it to anyone but me (so I'm here admitting it for him, ha).
Sadly my bath pouf is on its way out! it was a good one too .. im quite disappointed to see it go :( we had many showers and baths together.. they just wont be the same. R.I.P.
Ok, I just read the article and the comments following. I am laughing my head off! Thanks for making my day and Shaun, we want more writing from you! (I think you should disclose was shower gel/bodywash you use on your pouf, lol) :-P
Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it! I've been using mostly Philosophy Shower Gel because we have a bunch of bottles in various different scents. I also used some of the Tom Ford Shower Gel which made me feel quite sexy.
Hahaha this is brilliant! My boyfriend, too, uses the pouf just like me! Although he agrees with your advice of manlier colors. We don't live together but mine is neon pink (and currently a sunflower, I need a new one stat!) but his is a very manly royal blue. You should write more! Not that I don't adore Christine but your posts are wonderful as well!
Too funny! BBW poufs are the worst, I get 3 uses maximum before the rope breaks off!
You illuminated my mind with this review! LoL! Ty!!!
"Buy many, and buy a few in manlier colors. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to cry myself through the shower while washing myself with a lavender pouf. Your guy will use it, but he’ll be more covert-ops about it if it is the color of lilac." well, I think that if the guy wants to use it, he can simply go and buy one by himself of the colour he does prefer! He is adult and able to drive to a shop!
This is a great review!! It made me laugh :D My bf is slowly getting into using a pouf. I bought him a white one since it was the most 'manly' colour i could find and he does agree that it needs less showergel and secretly i think he loves it ;)
Bath pouf?! Psh - what is it 1990? Get yourself a Salux Nylon Japanese Bath Towel and you'll never look back. It's awesome from start to finish (finish being several months later when it gets weak enough and tears).
You forget yourself! 1990?!? My word, I have never been so insulted. I take the challenge of your Salux Nylon Japanese Bath Towel and I will report back!
Hahaha, great article. My husband uses the Axe "detailer"--one of those two-sided deals. I am a die-hard pouf user. I like the one by Eco Tools. It's made of recycled plastic, and it doesn't sunflower out or unravel like the cheaper ones. It's also a unisex beige color. I LOVED/hated the Soap & Glory pouf--the mesh was covered with a filmy soft material that felt so good, but it tore very easily. FYI you should disinfect your pouf on a regular basis. Soak it in the sink with diluted bleach, or put it on the top shelf of the dishwasher. Microwave disinfection works too (nuke the wet pouf for about a minute), but the side lying down always gets flattened and crunchy.
God gave me arms that render me Tyrannosaurus rex-like. Probably not really, but it feels as such, so I'm a bath pouf on a stick person. It doesn't get much better than your bath pouf being on a stick. :)
Everything is better on a stick!
My bf uses some exfoliating gel for body bought by mistake as a face scrub for me from a discount store lol. Im so glad i even made him use a face cleanser and moisturizer hes so addicted to it now. Do you use face stuff Shaun?
I currently use some minty fresh face wash in the shower. I generally just use what Christine puts in the shower. I also moisturize with either a moisturizer with SPF or without, depending on the weather and my state of lethargy.
This article was hilarious! Write more often, Shaun! :) I usually buy Bath & Body Works poufs, but the rope comes undone before it's even out of the cocoon phase. When that happens, I have my husband tie it in a really tight knot, then use a lighter to melt the knot. (This only works if the rope isn't extremely flammable! The B&BW ones are coated.) Melt a little, then blow to cool, melt some more, blow some more, etc. :) This keeps the rope from unraveling until you're ready to throw the pouf out entirely! But my husband is a bit of a pyro anyway; I would only recommend this to people who are well versed in burning things. ;)
Oh Shaun, everytime you write you get your pink card punched. Don't worry, we love you even more everytime you do. =P I do completely agree that bar soaps are the evil. Heck, I'm planning to turn my LUSH bar soaps into shower gels. Soaps that smell heavenly but unavailable in liquid form are temptation from hell itself. >:
A loofa is a bath poof.
Hahahahaha, great post. Love the "evolution of pouf" pic too.
This reminded me of Craig "Ironhead" Heyward's awesome ads for Zest body wash: "But Ironhead, what's with this thingy?" RIP, Ironhead. My pouf from the Target dollar bin went straight from cocoon to "long useless tube of seaweed" in about three days. The boyfriend uses poufs but he also enjoys painful rituals like scrubbing his skin off with an extra-rough cloth from the Japanese supermarket, and also taking 800℉ baths in the middle of July to "burn off the sweat".
I have been an avid bath pouf user for most of my life :). Unfortunately, my boyfriend doesn't share the same passion and affection for it as you do and he is committed to his wash cloth! :( *sigh* He won't give it up and thus our shower will always have 1 pouf and 1 wash cloth!
Don't worry about using a bath "pouf," Shaun. Almost all those bad mammajamma soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan use them!
Le-gan- wait for it... Dary!
The boyf is a washrag kind of guy. I bought him a perfectly good bath... pouf... thingy - a nice black one with a silicon strap that's all nice and MANLY - but he refuses to use it. What's up with that? It's about time to replace mine. The string broke and it's getting kind of sunflowery. You've served me well, Pinky Puff.
hehehe You're funny :) The husband and I use bath poufs. They used to turn into sunflowers really quick until I bought some (yes, some, I'm all for the backups!) at The Body Shop. They're really good. They have the kind you used in your picture and another one that's a bit more like a ball/apple shape. I don't think you'd like it, though, because it stays in the cocoon stage a lot longer.
you really poured a lot of thought into this. My man had used to use bar of soap. I complained a lot so finally he's switched to using this magic. Result: we have a cleaner bathroom, the shower curtain stays fresh longer without the bar soap scum
I made my boyfriend use one coz he was washing my fav lush soap down the drain with the bar of soap method of cleansing. The pouf uses less soap! Soo economical. :)
our loofah of choice is called a "bath wash cloth/towel" and is pictured here: http://www.thebeautyreviewcenter.com/Salux-Nylon-Japanese-Beauty-Skin-Bath-Wash-Cloth-Towel.html -- it's more of an elongated "cloth" made of synthetic fibers that can be scrunched up or stretched out.
If only I could get my dad (and mom) to use a pouf. He refuses to use a pouf; he's a (retired) military man. He uses a bar of soap (okay, it's Dove. I will admit he's the one military guy who uses Dove soap. Don't tell the others. It's sissy soap in the military world. My mom at least uses a washcloth and Dove. What's the shame of a pouf people?) The world of poufs is a wonderful thing. I totally think the middle stage should be called Nirvana or Heaven or Perfection or something. Question marks are not the answer!
This is AMAZING! My boyfriend also loves the bath pouf. Hope to see more posts, Shaun the Tech Guy!
Haha I loved reading this! You MUST do more posts!
I love it! This was absolutely hilarious but informative too! lol I was just wondering when I was going to replace mine..
My bath pouf is on the sunflower phase D: On the other hand, my exfoliating gloves....oh! those babies last forever!! Great post, Shaun! super funny.
Bahaha. This is definitely an interesting and hilarious post. Um, one of these typically transforms from cocoon to sunflower in about... two weeks. I guess I have a thick hide or something, or I just like scrubbing. Even with the tips provided, which I follow, mostly, body poufs or loofahs just don't do enough for me. I actually bit the bullet and tried the Salux Body Cloth that's so raved on MakeupAlley, and I have to say that stuff is pretty amazing. I don't even have to use sugar/salt scrubs anymore. I mean, it's nothing particularly unique, it's just a very good exfoliating tool. Yeah, that was probably too much information. Haha. One more thing, I'm surprised that you made the distinction to describe different shades of purple as lavender and lilac. I personally don't even know the difference. Christine's rubbing on you. :]
Yeah, every time I say something is a certain color she has some other crazy name for it. That's not red, it's crushed velvet!
Agreed. I mean how does crushed insinuate any reference to a change in color. I'd imagine anything crushed retains its color and pigmentation. But then again... carbon or graphite crushed at insane pressures becomes diamonds, and that is certain a huge color change. But then again, there is also heat present... which drives chemical processes and composition and manifests with physical expression... Wow, okay this train of thought has gone on for far too long. God I'm such nerd.
My bf and I keep separate ones in the shower cuz his turns from sunflower to roadkill stage in less than two weeks, so gross. *shudder*
lol!!! Sorry that just made me laugh, that sounds like my boyfriend to! lol
I'm currently at the cocoon stage... Pure rage every time I have a shower :(
Oh man I was worried u 2 broke up. Because clearly i think beauty reviews are indicative of happiness in a relationship :p. Glad to have u back! :D
Thanks! You'll see an angry Temptalia X site come out if we ever break up. Filled with my angry tirades against the world of beauty.
I don't like the bath pouf. I use http://uncommonscents.com/Aquis-Essentials-Exfoliating-Wash-Cloth-p/aqaex3040li.htm?click=18801&gdftrk=gdfV21616_a_7c54_a_7c104_a_7cAQAEX3040LI Its like a loofah, a pouf, and a wash cloth all in one. Its exfoliating and makes great lather. It's also washable! So i throw mine in the wash about once a month and its like brand new! :)
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