Tuesday, July 13th, 2010

The Tech Guy Shaun, aka The Tech Guy, aka my boyfriend, is here with another must-read “manly” review. He’s twenty-seven with normal-to-dry skin and suffers from no more acne (much to my envy!).  After much brouhaha over AXE commercials, he decided to give it a try himself (I really think he was hoping for hilarity to report back with)–but let me tell you, I kept sneezing every time he wore this!  Not offensive necessarily but really got my allergies going.

Shaun enjoys long walks on the beach, vegging out on the couch watching chick flicks, and cuddling with Mellan. Or maybe not! He handles all the behind-the-scenes action here at Temptalia, from tech support to server woes to being my shoulder to cry on.

I’ve never been one of THOSE guys… You know, the club going, glittery shirt, spiky hair kind of guy? But I’ve heard a lot of negative stuff about AXE and its various products that are seemingly targeting THAT guy. So, being on the outside looking in… And I don’t mean the guy in the line outside of the club looking in… COME ON, I’VE BEEN WAITING OUT HERE FOR THREE HOURS! Ahem, I decided to give AXE Body Spray a try.

First, if you are a guy, you have to realize that this isn’t an antiperspirant.  It’s not going to stop you from sweating when you are cutting a rug and showing unsightly spots around the pit region of your brand new glittery Ed hardy shirt. As for the smell, I took a whiff of various models and picked one with the least offending odor. To me, it just smells like generic man smell. I couldn’t differentiate it with any other man body spray.

The usage is a bit odd. They tell you to spray six inches away from your body, and while this gives you full coverage it also sprays about half of it into the atmosphere causing a hole in the ozone layer directly above you. I think this is the reason why most guys who use this stuff end up turning a bright orange color.

If you don’t douse yourself in the stuff, it lingers for a decent amount of time and will cover any frosted tip or hair wax smell that you may be harboring. On the bottle it claims that there’s “citrus extract,” but a quick look at the ingredient list yields a list of words so foreign to the human eye that it might as well be in KLINGON! Star Trek reference! BOOYAH!

RECOMMENDATION: It’s not for me. I don’t think it’s a bad product, but I would rather have a deodorant that prevents sweating and doesn’t potentially blind me if I go too medieval with the spray can.

Just FYI, you can follow me on twitter @shauntechguy. If I ever decide to take over the world all of my twitter followers will be exempt from slave labor. Just keep that in mind.

See more photos!

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56 thoughts on “AXE Rise Body Spray Review & Photos

  1. HAHAHAHA! Great review! I would never buy AXE for my husband, based simply on the d-bag commercials.

    Even worse, my old boss was a skeezy little sweatball, and he used to douse himself in TAG.

  2. Cindy

    Loved your review! Why do they even make this stuff? I prefer my husband to not wear any cologne & never, ever ‘Man spray’. Deodorant only. Glad you reached the right & obvious conclusion.

  3. Vijaya

    I, personally, feel the urge to vomit every time I smell Axe (I know quite a few boys who I’m sure spray it on in lieu of a proper shower).

  4. LuvJ

    Sorry Shaun, sorry to hear this didn’t turn Christine animalistic like the girls on the commercials.. No tearing off your glittery Ed Hardy shirt (it’s all good no shame in admitting you own one)and disheveling your hair. No pawing you and pinning you down to the ground.. well, no need to kill that fantasy, because –there’s Mellan for that.

    Now head back to the drugstore and return that useless thing and pick up a box of Zyrtec for poor Christine.

    P.S. Thanks for the review, I’ll make sure to steer my husband away from the Axe aisle the next time we’re shopping ;)

  5. hahaha great review. good to hear there are more guys out there who dont want to be orange…. :)

  6. I love your writing style, you definitely gave me a good laugh and I loved the Klingon reference, haha. My boyfriend hates Axe. He’s not THAT guy either. Actually, he’s an electrician and he’s like a hot sweaty Betty when he’s working, especially outside in the summer or when he’s up in attics. Maybe it’d be better if they formulated something that goes beyond THAT guy, yet doesn’t smell like pretty man stink AND includes an antiperspirant.

  7. Ashley

    Hahaha I love your reviews. I hope other guys realize we won’t go wild over them because they have Axe on.

  8. Laura

    LOL love this! he sounds like my husband :-)

  9. Roxanne

    If Shaun can’t make it smell good, no one can. I hate the way it smells and for the life of me can’t figure out why guys like it so much. They seem to somehow think this smell is some kind of “signal” to women, meaning as much as “RESISTENCE IS FUTILE, DROP YOUR PANTIES”. Whatever it is… deo’s before ho’s, dudes.

    • Haha oh my god. This made me laugh so hard!

    • CeeBee

      THAT needs to go on a T-shirt! LOL!

      It’s called Lynx in NZ (not sure why) and the ad for the new Twist one says “Women get bored easily. Change it up with Lynx/Axe Twist.” and I’m like “Whatever Marketing Dude – don’t think it’s such a flash idea to insult women, since, ya’know, we’re the ones who do the actual shopping…”
      Idiot!

      Thanks for confirming this stuff is as nasty as I thought it was, Shaun!

  10. paige

    Temptalia,your boyfriend is awesome!

  11. Vanessa

    These are the most hilarious reviews, ever. And AXE… just covers what would have been good hygiene with the facade of dubious hygiene. Who wants that?!

  12. funny review, any uk-ers i think this is “lynx”

  13. Rinnie

    I’m delurking here for the first time, because I couldn’t resist the Star Trek reference. Shaun and my BF could be friends over that, I had a convo with him the other day about what the Borg was truly a representation of in modern society. (Props to the “resistence is futile” jab too!) Anyway, my BF has used AXE and he’s not THAT guy, nothing like it fortunately, but his friends are, and he was told to use it because he smokes. Then I bought him a REAL man’s cologne because I’m the one that has to smell him, so I pick the scent. We (ok, me) are much happier for it.

  14. Avatar of Jill AnGeLwInGz

    HAHAHAHA!!!!! My brother uses that stuff and I can’t stand it. It lingers heavily in the air long after he’s left the house. Good thing my fiance is too old to be into that body spray craze. Thanks again for another great review Shaun!

    • Paloma

      DUDE. I totally know when my boyfriend has just left for work and possibly is the cause of my waking up in the morning……Evidence: The smell of AXE when I walk into the hallway.

  15. Avatar of Melissa Melissa (divinem)

    My son had me buying this for him, but he doesn’t seem to understand that one should use a tiny amount, not the whole fracking can in one week! I stopped buying it for him because it was becoming hard to breathe!

  16. ali

    AXE is what middle school boys wear to attract girls.

  17. sydney young

    I love your boyfriends reviews they are hilarious! That being said i agree, Axe is the worst smelling stuff in the world. I would die before i dated a man that smelled of axe.

  18. Avatar of Katie Katie

    Hahaha!!! You should have your bf do more reviews Christine. He has an excellent sense of humor. :) As for AXE, I dated a guy once who said the trick was to spray on the TINIEST amount possible and then it could smell nice… not like a lot of guys who empty the can trying to make themselves smell “good.”

  19. Mindy

    lmao, my dude won’t even whiff this stuff because of the douchy looking commercials.

  20. Well said. I prefer the scent of my hair wax over this or Tag!

    Nice Star Wars reference btw. +2 for Shaun!

  21. Smak

    I was so excited that I got the star trek reference haha…

  22. LOVE it! Keep Shaun coming!

  23. Cherie

    I think the FYI was my favourite part! LOL

  24. Steph

    My boyfriend had the Axe Snakepeel shower scrub in his shower, and I used it one time I spent the night. It felt so good! Once again, not the greatest smell, but I loooved using it!

  25. az

    AAHAHAH omg I was actually laughing out loud! You’re really funny, and that was actually a great review. You should do more reviews often! I’m following you on twitter now, and your tweets are even hilarious!

  26. Tiffany

    uh oh…im having axe chocolate flashbacks… :X thats stuff is stomach turning!

  27. freakin hilarious!! you two are such a great team!

  28. Oh my god.
    Christine, this one’s a keeper, he’s hilarious! :)

  29. But haven’t you tried the chocolate one?! What’s it called, dark-temptation?
    I LOVE that one, I use it for myself!

    (Well, in a different way. My roommate in dorm had gas issues, sadly. My room smelled like a big hunky, manly, chocolate bar 24/7)! But I have to say, the smell of THAT one is amazing! LOL!

  30. Nikki C.

    i don’t really like axe because guys usually use like 9 million times too much
    i prefer the old spice swagger scent
    it’s what my boyfriend uses:]

  31. Lowie

    Aw! you’re boyfriend seems so cute. What a great sense of humor and what a fun review to read! Thanks Shaun and Christine!

  32. Miss Silver

    They call that product ‘Lynx’ here in New Zealand. Smells terrible; guys think they have to spray the entire bottle of it on their person every single use. I have a flatmate who does this; smells like an explosion at the deodorant factory every time. Ugh! Gives me a headache, it does.

    My boyfriend doesn’t wear any of these products, thank God. And my boyfriend is a tech guy too, so LOL! :D

  33. Wendy M.

    Shaun, you’re hilarious!
    I love reading your reviews, I hope Christine lets you review more things!
    Following you on twitter. :D

  34. Arduinna4

    Funny stuff. :)

  35. Yay for man reviews :D My brother lives off this stuff and he thoroughly enjoys spraying it in my room to annoy me.

  36. Avatar of Katarzyna kasiaj85

    ahaha lovely! your reviews are super cool and each time I read it I can’t stop the giggle (though I’m just a bit too old for that!) Not buying that for my husband, defnitely! :)

  37. Margot

    Good to know I’ll be exempt of slave labor :)
    Great review, as always. I usually hate the smell of Axe products and I’m pretty sure I would never ever buy it for my bf.

  38. Proximity

    Well reviewed …. I don’t think that deodorant and fragrance should cross over. One is for preventing stink (or sweat, if that’s what you want) and the other is pretty much an art form to be appreciated by the nose.
    My husband just wears whatever deodorant/antiperspirant smells least overwhelming or whatever he picks out for himself … if he wants to smell good, he wears Bulgari Black :)

  39. kim l

    “brand new glittery Ed hardy shirt” LOL you have a great boyfriend Christine!

  40. Avatar of Alisha Alisha in WI

    LOL. Don’t try the “hair putty” either. My husband bought it and it looked TERRIBLE. I just took it and hid it in the closet so he wouldn’t use it again.

  41. o0oCarinao0o

    xD

    I love your reviews. My husband used Axe for a while…the deodorant too.

    He which to Old Spice. The deodorant smells so much better. Everytime I smell Axe I think of one of those guys with greasy hair, and polyester shirts that haven’t been buttoned up completely…not cool….

    >.>;;

  42. Ms. Jimmi

    There is nothing worse than the smell of Axe or Tag on a man. It screams tacky. I love my man in a little Royal Copenhagen or just soap and water.

  43. Thanks for this post – I really like it!!

  44. Wilcoa

    I imagine if I got my bf to read this he would respond “but at least they’d make good rockets when you heat them.” :P

  45. Josiane

    HAHAHA you are so awesone and I loved the douche bag references in this review
    I’m glad for christine that this product is not for you

  46. Helena

    Lol. I absolutely abhor Axe/other “manly” body sprays. They smell terrible and their ads stink metaphorically.

  47. Kitty

    HAHA!!! I cracked up at the Star Trek reference!

  48. Carolina

    Can’t axe put somekind of stopper on that press button. My brother is using it like it’s airfreshner (more like strong bugspray), or…for chasing away the rest of the members in d house. At least they should provide asthma inhalers with it..2 for 1.

  49. I enjoyed this post and lol. Please write more often because it would help us decide what to buy and what not for our men (though we know what to buy but you know…sometimes a little push is needed)
    I don’t like axe deodorants because they definitely smell like “Men”. Here in India, almost every men deodorant smells like Axe or Axe smells like other sprays. Yeeks!!