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Have you ever had to hide your love for makeup?


Have you ever had to hide your love for makeup? Share!

I’m very lucky to have such a supportive network of friends & family! When I first started wearing makeup, I was obsessed, and everyone in my family knew it! I didn’t feel like I had to hide it at all.

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Katie Avatar

I work as a retail associate in a store that sells a product with a consumer base that is male-dominated. I’ve definitely noticed that I get treated with more derision and dismissiveness when I’m obviously wearing makeup, but I’m too contrary to hide it.

Quinctia Avatar

That stinks. I’m in a similar position, and I’ve really only experienced the opposite. I’ve worked at my job quite awhile, though, so I imagine a lot of people have gotten used to it.

LU Avatar

Not really, my friends and family know I’m obsessed, they even come to me for advice on all things beauty/skincare, and often joke around that I am in the wrong career and should study cosmetology or dermatology. LOL. XP

Miss J Avatar

I wouldn’t say that I hide it, but beauty stuff isn’t something I really talk about with anyone outside of this blog. You’re lucky you have supportive friends and family!! I don’t know what that’s like, lol.

polkadots Avatar

Kinda. When I am out shopping with my hubby, I have to walk pass any make up store or counter. It’s not that he’s not supportive, but that he’s doesn’t want to be around giggly, excited women and their recent makeup purchases. Just not his thing.

Michelle Avatar

I’m doing this right now ! Lol!
I add my 2nd post in my blog today. About the new Dior gel polish.
It’s funny but not that easy to make reviews. I like it a lot and really enjoyed doping it!
I’ll show my blog to my friends and families when there are some followers to prove that i may did something nice.
For now i’m too shy to reveal it to them.
Xoxo

Michelle Avatar

Actually my problème is that i was late to interest in Makeup.
So most of my friends and familiy knew me without that much interests.
Now, from a year, i feel kind of passionated by the creativity of the Makeup world.
But most of the people dont understand that much interests, and see make up as superficial and monney waisting things.
That’s why i decided to create a blog and try to do some reviews in hope to meet people with the same interests and get some supports from people with same passion 🙂

PJ Avatar

I have loved makeup since I was a little kid dressing up for Halloween and dance recitals, and still do. I have yet to find others in my profession ( RN) who get as excited as I do about it– except for one– and I call her my “Chanel Buddy”. When we talk makeup, everyone around us seems clueless and bored. Although I don’t understand what woman wouldn’t like make up! Why not flaunt your beauty and femininity?

Shelley Avatar

I’m an RN too. People see me looking at swatches on the night shift and I’m always wearing different eyeshadow so it’s pretty obvious to everyone I work with. 😛 But I have been asked to do wedding makeup for several of my work friends now, which is fun. And teach, I’ve done a fair amount of makeup teaching (ie what eyeshadow primer is and how to use it). I have a few friends at work who like makeup, but none even close to my…ehem…extreme. I don’t think my family really has any clue how much time and money I put into my makeup hobby and they would be horrified if they knew; they would feel it’s way too frivolous. I have several sisters that I can’t talk about make up at all around because they hate it so much. I take great pleasure in wearing bright purple lipstick when I’m with them. 😉 My husband is a sweetheart though and very supportive. The only things he’s ever told me is that he’s not a fan of red or dark lipstick and that he likes me without or without makeup the same.

Brenda Avatar

Unfortunately I was made to feel like it was frivolous, and no one else in my family or friends was into makeup, even in high school. So i never talked about it and usually hid my purchases. My family (except my sister) still doesn’t get it and I get tired of hearing “You don’t need another blah blah blah”

Working in tool companies and landscaping later on, yeah, didn’t really run into anyone like minded so….

WendyM Avatar

Sadly, yes!

My mother was a staunch ‘no makeup’ type woman and I have always been involved in athletics. When I was in my teens 30+years ago (eep), it seemed that women lived in two camps and athletes did NOT wear makeup. This year watching the winter Olympics, I was so heartened to seem many young female athletes proudly wearing makeup during competition..and not just the skaters 🙂 To each her own..as it should be.

When I moved away from home to study at University, I began my love affair with makeup… it was the early 80’s and so it didn’t take me long to jump in with abandon. Siouxsie Sioux was a huge icon of mine.

Maura Avatar

I’ve never actively hidden that I love makeup, but my mother always made me feel that investing too much time or money in it was frivolous. Because of this I still feel a bit guilty making a splurge. However, I think the benefit of this is that I went from a teenage who would never leave the house without at least 30 minutes of makeup application to a woman who has a healthy relationship with makeup and can go to the grocery store with nothing and feel OK! My mother helped me take a step back from the all-consuming obsession and become a more well-rounded person.

Bella Avatar

When I’m in situations where I know people are a little more conservative, I tend to tone things down a little, but other than that, not really.

I work in a cosmetic derm office, so being obsessed with products is pretty much normal, if not encouraged.

And as far as in my personal life, my friends and immediate family all like it. If they like certain looks and colors more than others, I’ll probably hear it, but no one says I shouldn’t do it. Even my boyfriend has developed a sort of fascination with the artistic side of it.

faerieevenstar Avatar

Yes… I have some friends who see it as “shallow” and who think “women don’t need make-up to look beautiful” and tell me so frequently. I agree, but I LIKE make-up and see it as an art from and creative expression and the fact I love it doesn’t mean I’m shallow and vacuous and trying to hide behind it. People can be very hurtful when they’re trying to be positive about body image etc, but actually end up upsetting me about something I’m passionate about as much as I am painting and sculpting.. just because it’s on my face I must be trying to hide and think I look ugly without it :\

redacted Avatar

Targeting me? I know you’re not really. I’m not paranoid, but I do see a major addiction over the decades. I use ‘redacted’ to disassociate myself from my ‘real identity.’ Actually, despite the decades I have taken to accrue a ‘stockyard,’ my true self wishes I had donated to Red Cross, Physicians Without Borders, saving amphibians from chytrid disease, etc., women’s literacy causes in developing nations, and dog shelters, rather than spend these thousands on makeup. I have not put my money where my mind is….or maybe I have, much to my embarrassment. ST I actually feel frivolous + shallow. In some ways, this addiction is very disheartening, but better than cocaine!

Brynna Avatar

I wouldn’t say I hide my makeup obsession, more so than my YouTube/blog obsession regarding makeup. Most people I know only are familiar with that world in regards to funny cat videos and possibly JennaMarbles (who I also love). So if I ever say that I watch a lot of beauty videos or follow (maybe 100?) blogs, I get weird looks and overall confusion. So I just keep to myself, and answer all of the beauty-related questions from my friends and family.

Emy Avatar

Yes. Though for me, it is less makeup than it is skincare. My mom is supportive of me taking care of my skin, but she is very frugal, and would likely be upset at the amount of money I’m spending on skincare products. So I try not to discuss them with her.

Choinim Avatar

I got into makeup relatively late, when I was around 18 or 19 and I knew very little about brands, and dupes etc. Back then Youtube gurus were just starting to do their thing online and I still didn’t know about Temptalia. I was at university and wore whatever I wanted, neutrals, rainbow, random, whatever. At 21 I trained to be a teacher and toned it down a lot, mainly to just a thin layer of drugstore foundation, eyeliner and mascara. Now that I’m 25 I’ve been teaching for a solid 4 years and have the income to buy better stuff and the knowledge of what to buy through temptalia and youtube reviews. My makeup collection is HUGE and I’m constantly giving things away (my friends and cousins LOVE me) to make room for new stuff. But sadly I did have to hide my love for makeup at work. I never wear colours that are too out there and feel too old for glitter eyeliner. Most of all it’s my students who will judge me for wearing makeup – and it’s usually boys! Most of the girls are fine but the boys – whether 11 or 18 (the age range i teach) they don’t like a stitch of makeup. I know, it’s very odd! But I don’t like hearing comments about makeup and girls just compliment on a fresh face or nice mascara but boys think a bit of eyeliner is too much. It’s annoying. But recently I’ve decided to just wear what I like. The staff don’t seem to notice, the ones who do say it’s very subtle and toned down. The female students will compliment or not notice. And the boys, well, I can’t really take their opinion seriously!

Paige Avatar

Some of my friends and my family members will tell me I look unnatural, trashy (if I wear anything brighter than a pink lipstick) or that I am wasting my money, or if I have to wear makeup, I should at least try to make money out of it because makeup is a money black hole. I never toned it down though, because it is a part of my expression of who I am or what I feel (including rebellion perhaps?). But I am glad there are also friends who are supportive of it, and my husband encourages me to use whatever makeup I want as long as it makes me happy! =)

Paige Avatar

Ah, I did not really tell them off because they did not say that in a nasty manner. They were genuinely concerned (but genuinely wrong I guess!), however I did not really tone down even then… A few came around to it in the end. Haha. =)

Pippa Avatar

Yes, I’m not pretty so I don’t want people thinking I think a lot of myself, or wondering why I bother so I only let my friends who know me well know.
Xx

Caroline Avatar

Yes and no. Everyone in my life knows I am addicted (not just to makeup, but also to skincare and especially to perfume) and they are all accepting of that. The only aspect of it that I have ever felt I should hide at times is the amount of money I’ve spent/the price of things I’ve purchased.
My husband doesn’t mind in the least me being so into makeup and perfume-he likes it, to be honest-but he has no idea how much good quality stuff costs or how much I have spent at times, and if he ever found out he’d be really shocked! lol

Lucy Avatar

I do battle with a lot of confusion from my friends, near and dear ones, mainly because I spend the greatest part of my life not wearing any make-up at all. But about 3 years ago I fell in love with playing with make-p. My husband still prefers natural but is slowly getting used to it as long as I don’t go OTT. But for me it is just loving all the colors and structures and brushes and the whole ritual I love and enjoy. I am very sick and spend much time not being able to do much, so playing with my make-up and brushes makes me very peaceful. I just keep tinkering with it, sometimes I wash it off just so I can start again. Yup, I am that crazy. I used to paint and draw but I haven’t been able to do anything more than just doodle, so for me make-up replaces my former creative outlet. So yes, sometimes I am sitting on the coach in sweats with full make-up :p going nowhere. (so why not go OTT!) But I also use it to curb my anxiety if I do need to go somewhere, it works better than a Xanax ^^ And I love to learn new techniques and so on. So they understand that part, just not why I have so much make-up. I think I got a bit greedy, longing something just for me and me alone, but I am also in love with colors, palettes, prettiness. None of my friends have a love-affair with make-up. So I am not really hiding it, but I am apologizing for it continuously, knowing they don’t really understand, and yes, I do hide part of it because I just have too much… I am thoroughly embarrassed by the money I spend on it, even though I always shop blog sales and swaps and sales only, it is still money I actually really need to fix the house that hasn’t been painted in 16 years. But I guess I want to paint myself first…

Lucy Avatar

BTW, I am 47. I wore make-up from 15 to 17, and later on only on rare occasions, do my make-up obsession started at 45… And I still have no problem leaving the house or opening the door without any make-up. It is not that I don’t feel complete without make-up, I just love, love, love to play with it. Some say I should start for MUA but I don’t feel like that at all. I just want to play with colors on my face.

It is the kind of love you loose after 16 years of recurring severe depressions, that actually recently may spiral in the worst shape, depression with border-psychotic tendencies 🙁

Just 3 weeks ago I attacked my own face with a scissor, splashed with bleach and cut of all my hair (it hadn’t been shortened for 20 years). That was the result of feeling guilty of being selfish for loving make-up and needing to be punished. Apparently after major depressions have created enough damage to your brain your feelings of guilt ans shame and self-hate can create psychosis-like episodes where you act out all that anger and self-hate on yourself. (which sucks, because I have always fought very heart NOT to harm myself or kill myself, but in these episodes you are not completely present/awake)

Fortunately I did not completely loose my sanity, I snapped out of it in time and called a friend to rake me to the hospital, so no major damage was done (and my hair will eventually grow back… although it bites that my crew-cut brothers now have longer hair than me).

But after I landed and was able to lose some of the fears (just like a bad dream can make certain emotions stay with you after you wake up, because you were fighting something in your dream) I am back playing with make-up.

My love for make-up does not make me evil or selfish, for everything I have lost to that horrible illness I deserve the joy these luxury non-essential unnecessary things give me! So crazy, sure, but hell no! I do truly love my make-up 🙂

And I know I confess way too much here, but I also feel it is good for everyone to know that ‘crazy people’ are also just regular people. Just because one part is not functioning doesn’t mean the whole person is lost. There is still more me than illness. So I hope you will post this, if only for that reason.

Ryou Avatar

*sends you a million hugs* I’m very, very sorry that had to happen to you. I know from experience how hard it is to deal with a mental disorder, and I really wish I could do something to help.

Most people don’t understand that mental disorders don’t just go away, most who have “recovered” merely found ways to control their conditions enough to not interfere with their everyday lives, and that’s HARD. Not many people get that you don’t do the things you do because you WANT to and it really hurts to be antagonized for it.

What I find helps with my borderline is to allow myself to have bad days, to let myself feel the positive and negative emotions, and to communicate with those around me instead of bottling them up until breaking point. Of course it’s different for everyone, but I think the most fundamental is to accept. Try to repair your relationship with yourself first and foremost. Don’t push yourself to change, but try to find a workaround for the traits that you just can’t make peace with.

Please take care of yourself, and if you just want someone to talk to, please feel free to contact me. Do tell me if you want my e-mail address or something and I’d be more than happy to provide it for you.

If you’re not comfortable spilling everything to a complete stranger (which is very understandable), try to contact jo [at] thesamaritans [dot] org, which is a 100% anonymous, volunteer-run organization that focuses on suicide prevention. They have helped me more than once, I find them non-judgmental and they don’t provide advice, but they will be there for you to listen. An alternative is http://thequietplaceproject.com/ which is community-based.

I apologize for the length of my comments and if you feel it’s unsolicited, but I feel strong empathy for you and I really wish I could help even a little. *hugs*

Lucy Avatar

thank you for your sweet words 🙂 That helps!

Yes, mental illnesses are so hard to understand for so many people. So I love my friends who do get it and still have so much respect and love for me to bits!

My illness is only part of me, there is plenty of me left that is perfectly me. Fun, creative, intelligent, warmhearted, its still all there.

Living with mental illness is a never ending work, with loads and loads of bumps, but at the same time I have met so many beautiful, brave, courageous and precious people.

It just breaks my heart every time I hear people not giving us ‘nut-jobs’ a second look, they have no idea what they are missing!

And that we do actually deserve loads of respect for the never ending fights we have to fight, and the unavoidable struggle to learn to accept all the things we lose along the way.

And thanks for your suggestions. I have a good safety net in place at the moment, but who knows, maybe some one else needs the info 🙂 *hugs* <3

Ryou Avatar

I’m glad if I could be a support even if it’s just a little. I completely agree with you that while our illnesses might be part of us, but so is every other trait we have — Don’t ever let it define you.

Not a single soul that live on this earth fit in a mold, but people are so scared of anything unusual that they tend to feel more comfortable with those who seem remarkably unremarkable and forget to respect those who are “different”.

Thank you again for sharing your story, I believe that the hardest battle is one that you fight alone, and it’s always comforting knowing I’m really not alone, after all. <3 *hugs*

Ryou Avatar

I do the EXACT same thing you do. I spend most of my days at home, so sometimes I’d put on make-up just to play around, remove them, then play around some more. It’s fun and definitely inspiring.

I also used to draw a lot, even went to art school, but I got a repetitive strain injury on my dominant hand and I can’t draw much anymore, if at all. It made me really frustrated and I turned to make-up as a creative outlet.

Right now I’m also an advocate of feminism and equality in general, so I have a very strong opinion on people who would judge others on their make-up (or lifestyle choices in general, really). Thankfully that removed most of my insecurities about prejudiced strangers.

I do frequently kick myself for spending money on it when I’m a disabled job-seeker, but I’d much, MUCH rather invest in make-up than continue to be depressed because I can’t really draw anymore. If anything, it gave me an option — I’m planning to formally study make-up next year. While I can no longer be a full-time artist or photographer, there’s still a way for me to make a living by doing something artistic.

Thank you for sharing your experience, it’s certainly comforting to know that I’m not alone. 🙂

Lucy Avatar

Sorry to hear you had to give up drawing, that must have hurt. But yes, make-up is such a wonderful creative outlet! I find myself often with several brushes in my hand, tinkering away, mixing colors, trying new techniques.

My husband said ‘I never knew it was so much work to put on make-up’ so I told him, ‘Well, I can put on make-up in 2, 5, or 10 minutes but what I am doing now is just the pure joy of creating.’

And that joy is very valuable. Of all the time/energy/money one can waste away when you are depressed and/or disabled and/or unemployed, tinkering with pretty colors and having a blast is a pretty good choice! It helps me to re-energize myself for the more difficult challenges of life.

And I too am glad that I am not the only one :p

I too consider myself to be a feminist, and for me that means freedom to be who you are, so love make-up or don’t love make-up, its all fine.

Carla Avatar

@Lucy,
I am SO sorry that you’ve had and are still having such a difficult time.
I’m not going to say that I completely understand your situation, because I haven’t been there. I am physically disabled, from a massive cerebral hemorrhage I had back in 2001. I’m wheelchair-bound, have the use of only one hand, can’t drive, and get out of the house an average of once a week. When I do get out, I generally attract some attention, simply because of my chair.
It became fairly obvious to me, early on, that I could either crumple inwardly and feel like a “pitiful cripple, or I could by George give those people who stare something worth looking at!
I chose the latter, because the former was just too depressing.
I love what RYou said, “I do frequently kick myself for spending money on it when I’m a disabled job-seeker, but I’d much, MUCH rather invest in make-up than continue to be depressed.”
Did I hear THAT!
I, too, spend a good portion of my limited resources on makeup, jewelry, and clothes, and get criticized for it, but I find it to be a good coping mechanism, and one of the few remaining outlets I have for my “inner artist.”
I mean, if I have to be in a wheelchair, it’s MUCH healthier [in my opinion] to be “that pretty wheelchair-bound woman whose makeup always looks fantastic” than “that poor wheelchair-bound woman who always looks so sad and drab, the poor thing.”
I must be doing something right, because even though some people openly wonder why I “bother,” I often get asked for makeup advice by able-bodied women.

Ryou Avatar

@Carla, I’m so sorry to hear about your situation and that people can be very rude to you about your disability. I do have a lot of issue with how society views disabled people, again because I feel people always try to fit others into a mold. I personally find it dehumanizing and disrespectful. (Come on, mainstream media, can we have a disabled fictional character who is disabled just because? Not because they’re specifically written for their disability?)

How I see it, people are people, they are the sum of all their traits all at once. I think it’s very possible to acknowledge someone’s struggles without having to define them by their marginalization. You are you, you are a human being with feelings just like me, you might be someone I’m interacting with just this once on the internet, but that doesn’t make you any less human than I am. That doesn’t make your feelings and experiences any less relevant than mine. It shouldn’t be that hard to treat everyone as an individual. In fact, I think it’s rude not to.

In that sense, if I knew you personally, I’d probably distinguish you as “that lady whose make-up always looks amazing, who also happens to need a wheelchair to get around”, not the other way around.

Thank you for sharing your story with us, Carla,

Ryou Avatar

I have to admit that the situation with my hand completely devastated me, because I had been creating things for as long as I remember and I don’t know how NOT to be an artist. I’m still trying to reach around to find my way, but I’m getting there! (I hope)

Some people think the point of make-up is the result, while I challenge that statement. I find that the most enjoyable part of creating anything is the process, the result is just a nice bonus to go with it.

I’m very, very guilty on allocating way too much money in my budget for “frivolous spending”. However, I make a point to not neglect my responsibilities and not to harm anyone with my addiction. For example, I refuse to steal or get in debt, and I also would never use bill or rent money for make-up.

I figure as long as I stick to those responsibilities, I’m going to unapologetically devote my time, energy, and resources doing what I like. Sure, there are some sacrifices I have to make (I don’t eat out, for example), but I see no problem with it.

I do try to save up a little every month, though, but I try to make it realistic. Even $20 a month could probably get me a new laptop in a year or two, so I personally think it’s worth doing. All I need is a little patience. 🙂

Amalia Avatar

Sadly Yes! In Greece of crisis, where some families struggling to work out, the love for makeup is by many reprehensible. Of course the women around the world we are same, thus always we manage to take care ourself.

Carla Avatar

I never felt like I truly had to “hide” my love for makeup, but especially when I first started wearing it, I sneaked around to put it on, in an unsuccessful attempt to avoid criticism and scorn from my family.
Granted, some of my early efforts *were* undoubtedly wretched-looking, but a little more tact, and less “That looks RIDICULOUS!” and “You look like you fell into a coal mine!” “You’ve been putting on makeup all morning!” etc. would have been welcome.
Did it put me off makeup?
Not even CLOSE! :)

Toni Avatar

I do and get annoyed that I feel that i should. I wear it how I want but wouldn’t dare show my friends my makeup collection. They would see it as money wasting. People are so judgmental. At the end of the day, we all have interests and mine happens to be makeup. And I love it!

Sarah Avatar

I think it’s relaxing to start my day putting make-up on. Its something that I can learn something new about constantly. I also am a painter, and I feel as if this is another form of the same thing–using my own face as a canvas. Sometimes this is how I explain it to people. Usually, they want advice and help and are sort of charmed and surprised by my “hobby.” I had the whole front room of my house set up as a beauty studio, so it’s no secret how much stuff I have!!

Leila Avatar

I’ve had older people (parents of friends) that kinda thing judge me for wearing makeup but of course there’s always gonna be people out there that judge you no matter what, So I never hid it. I embrace it (: makeup is my passion why hide that?

Leticia Avatar

Fortunately, no! My family is cool about it and so are my friends – they all see it like something quite curious, as I am really the ONLY one that is totally obsessed with makeup. Even my boyfriend lets me be, though he does state once in a while that I wear too much makeup (if he actually knew how many products I wear for a regular look, he’d faint 🙂 !) !

AbigailOD Avatar

No, because same here I am blessed with (number 1) a supportive husband who never questions my silly cravings for makeup, and family and friends who I end up enabling to buy what I have!

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